If what I’ve said is true, this post teaches, better than I’ve seen written anywhere, the very first things we must learn, for ourselves, before we can buy into—and intelligently discriminate—advice from those marketing happiness.

Just take 3 & 4 above, for example. It doesn’t matter what we want to accomplish, fear will defeat us. Fear of failing, criticism, ridicule, even fear of success. Yet, caution and prudence are survival mechanisms that increase our odds of . . . survival. But if you want to do more than survive, you have to up the risk of ruin. That’s why advice from those that have succeeded by it is critical to reduce those odds, while still taking big risk. Do your homework, confront fears, reduce risk.

Now, Glen, let’s hear about bouncing back from failure, again and again.

This idea is very true, and there scientific research behind it now. Our happiness is set up in a way that keeps us striving, because if it wasn’t we’d get complacent. That’s potentially fine if you live in the modern west and can find a welfare state to mooch from, but not fine at all if you’re a caveman living in the wild – complacency can kill you!

So we evolved to adapt to the environment we’re in, which includes our possessions and bank balance. What starts out as a luxury becomes a necessity. Just think, there was a time before central heating, hot water at the twist of a tap, when exotic fruits from far away lands weren’t available at the shop 5 minutes down the street! 1000 years ago this stuff would have been paradise, but we take it all for granted!

Understanding this can lead to gratitude – and that is a place where you can find happiness. “It’s an important message….crucial, really” (quoting Patrick Bateman in American Psycho!) Just need to let more people know it!

I’ll share a Zen story that finally tipped it for me (short version from memory) with apologies to those who have heard it before:

A traveller visited a Zen Master who lived in a small one-room apartment, with little more than a bed, small table and a book on the table. The visitor had two huge suitcases and asked the Zen master where all his possessions were. The Zen master looked at the suitcases and said “Where are yours?” The traveller said “Well, I’m just a visitor here” and the Zen master said “So am I”

What’s going on right now scares me too. But I am going to persist regardless of my fear. Today I was in a meeting with our CEO and he sounded very optimistic. I told him I appreciated his optimism, because things seemed so bleak. He said, what I am saying isn’t optimism, its reality, we are going to kick ass. He’s right, we will, we always have, and you will too Fabi!

@Paul – thanks, I’ve heard of the book but haven’t had a chance to check it out yet. Glad you liked the post

@Kim – yes I’ve seen that video, very inspiring! I’m happy you liked this

I needed this too.

Kim

A great book regarding transcending fear is “Feel the Fear and do it Anyway” by Susan Jeffers.

It is worth looking at where the fear is; often it is only thought-based and coming back to the present moment (which you can’t leave anyway whatever you try!) can be enough to realise that your fear is of the past or future; neither of which you can live in.

You mentioned “only you can take action and make things happen” – these are very wise words! Chunking into manageable steps also helps; it can be overwhelming trying to tackle everything at once; mini successes build confidence and it is surprising how small steps can lead to big changes. My latest post on “Letting Go” may also help.

A tip I can share with the word fail is to look at the L as an ‘L’ plate – embracing failures and mistakes as learning curves helps you see opportunities.

Thanks for the post